40

Spent some time in one of my favorite places to celebrate my 40th birthday. A place on the coast my family started going to in 1976, before I was born.

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Snipped a small bouquet of chive flowers, nasturtium, borage, lavender, shungiku, fennel and, of course a few Shasta daisies just before dinner on my birthday.

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This was my son’s first visit and he loved it. I loved watching him walk along the paths of my childhood and down the rickety, wooden stairs to the beach. Most of those planks have been there since I was his age! The beach is one of the most magical, hidden coves.

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It’s so restorative to be back, so calm. A lot has changed over the years, but the Japanese soaking tub in the gazebo has not. I have memories from soaks here over the last four decades. Pennyroyal and salty grasses on the breeze, sea lions barking in the distance. It is amazing.

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Forty seemed like a big number before. Who would I be? But, the older I get and as I see people from my youth in their 70’s, I realize it doesn’t really mean much. I know myself better and feel like I’ve come into myself more the last few years. That is age, that is motherhood, experience, life. It keeps going and all of your experences keep adding up and you keep evolving (hopefully). Soak it in. This is life.